Check out today’s Speaking Of video! This week my Speaking Of Interview is with Mystic and Chris DuRant, who recently wrote a book called Bonus Mom, Bonus Mom. I talked to them about the idea, the process, and working together.
In the weekly update I talk about a frustrating bank error and how I’m growing to love the Berenstain Bears more and more!
Holy cow, I wrote my original “goals” post on January 22nd. It’s pretty amazing how much the world has changed since then. How could we have known that less than 2 months later, “coronavirus” would be something we’d see plastered all over the news and be at the forefront of our minds?
Even though the world certainly changed, I thought it would still be good to do something “normal” and check in on the goals I set in late January.
So, here’s where things stand (original text in black, 7.31.2020 update in purple):
I work for the same company I did in the south, which is pretty awesome because it means no commuting in the snow. Well, as mentioned in a previous post, I was laid off, but on the bright side, still no commuting in the snow! 🙂 Also, even brighter, I am now working on my Speaking Of show and I’m excited to see that grow.
I still need to lose weight (insert face palm emoji here…). I’m working on that with Caleigh. (GOAL:) Get in shape. For real. Once and for all. I don’t want to look at another damn picture and say “wouldn’t it be lovely if I ____.” I want to look at a picture and say “yes, that paid off. I’m so glad that I no longer use the whale emoji in texts to my friends when talking about heading to the pool or beach.” Well, Caleigh has done absolutely amazing with this. I am doing okay! I have lost about 15 pounds since Jan. 23rd, so that’s good – especially since we’ve been out of the gym since mid-March when covid closures started happening.
I still need to get this blog going (insert emoji of a clock here – what the heck have we been waiting for???) –I’m working on that with Dawn. I’m really proud of this one! I have been doing weekly posts on here, weekly short videos, AND weekly interviews, which is my favorite part!
I haven’t gotten to have Thanksgiving dinner or go to the mall with Bret Michaels (insert heart emoji here…) – honestly, that’s such a dream of mine, haha! I’ve met him a few times and he is the nicest human alive. I’m not even sure how he’s a real person. I have to get to hang with him at the mall for an afternoon at least once in my life! Well, shucks. This still hasn’t happened. I must figure out how to make this happen! I did get his book, which is lovely. I also just saw you can have him do a digital greeting. ❤
I still need to figure out how to make my dream of having a talk show come true – I’m trying to find the solution to that too. That one takes a lot of work. Or maybe I’m overthinking it. (GOAL:) FIGURE OUT HOW TO LIVE MY PASSION. Seriously. Guys, I know this must sound stupid on some level. She wants to talk for a living. I know that sounds nuts, but seriously, it’s what I want to do, it’s what people have done, and I need that to be me so that we’re not having this same conversation again in Jan. 2021. I want to be living my passion so that my family and friends are proud of me and think of me as someone who actually lives their dreams, not just fantasizes. Hooray! Okay, I’m MOST proud of this. I have been doing weekly interviews. I can’t even believe how amazing this has turned out. I started doing videos with Dawn shortly before I was laid off, and then started doing my interviews right after the lay off. I’ve done about 8-9 interviews in as many weeks and have more scheduled. I’m seriously so excited about this. This will be my career. It may take time, but it will be, and that is FABULOUS!
Figure out how to get the sassies (what I call it when my daughter is sassy) and periodic tantrums to go away and have the sweet smile return all the time. I know a smile 100% of the time is nuts too, she’s a kid, not a robot, but dang, I miss seeing that ever-present smile. She is still SO happy, but she’s also sassy sometimes. The other day on the phone with a customer service person, he asked if I had any other questions. I said yes, do you have any tips about toddler temper tantrums? He got a kick out of that, but sadly he had no tips to share. I continue to work on this! Things are improving (most days!). We tell her to make decisions by using her brain and her heart, and treat people nicely like Daniel Tiger, but it’s still a work in progress!! Being out of a normal routine and out of situations where she’s playing with other kids regularly has definitely up-ended things, but we’re taking it day by day!
Okay, looking over that, I’m actually doing pretty well. Who knew this “writing down your goals” thing was so helpful, haha! I’m hoping for continued progress when I post the next goals update at the end of the year!
Here’s the weekly interview preview and weekly update.
For this week’s interview, I’ll be talking to Kristin Poppa-Rosel about her quest for a kidney. Her dad is in need of a transplant and she’s working like crazy to find a living donor to help.
In the weekly update, I talk about some of the random post-preemie/pre-pandemic sanitation habits I developed after my daughter got out of the NICU! Who knew having a preemie would be a great training ground!?!
Is it me, or does time just seem to slip by, and there never seems to be time to get it all done?
Everyday, there’s a long list of things to complete: work, dinner, exercise, and of course taking care of your children, pets, etc. – taking care of kids and pets are a given, so they don’t need to go onto any kind of to-do list. But, taking care of them certainly does require time.
How do you get it all done? How does anyone? So many days it feels like hopping from one thing to the next, and before you know it, the King of Queens, or Golden Girls, or whatever show is on and you’re drifting off to sleep (btw, it’s always King of Queens in our house).
I’d like to think that most days, I’m pretty good at fitting everything in, but I often think that I should be doing something else, or something more. I definitely have mom guilt when my daughter knocks on my office door to see if I’m done for the day. And then when I am, we usually have to do something other than play – walk the dog, make dinner, etc.
It’s weird to think how things are still so busy, even in the days of mostly staying at home because of the ongoing pandemic. Still, somehow they are. Because things are *somewhat* normal, we’re now back on the schedule for kids’ classes, pet events, and the periodic small social event (seeing a close friend), and it seems more busy.
There doesn’t seem to be an answer for this. Just trying to be “present” in whatever part of the day it is seems to be the best we can do. It’s hard to let that guilt go, or that nagging feeling that you still have a few items left on the checklist that haven’t been completed.
I know that everyday is a new chance for me to learn how to avoid the guilt and the drive to get more done… but man, it’s hard to do! I think I’m getting a little better at it, but it’s definitely a process.
It’s also hard when there are so many things to be excited about – a new playset my daughter wants to use, or a new opportunity for Speaking Of (woot woot!), and training to do with the dog (that is really fun – especially because our dog seems so excited when she gets it right!).
I guess I just have to forget the idea of perfect balance. Some days, I’m in the office more. Some days, I am hanging out with my daughter for a while and we order dinner instead of make it (I’m working on this too, haha, you may have read my other post about dinner). It’s all okay.
Check out the latest Speaking Of interview, where I talk to Gervase Kolmos. Gervase is a certified mindset coach for moms. For 7 years she’s been helping moms navigate the waters of “motherhood AND,” not “motherhood OR” through her companies Shiny Happy Human and The Champagne Society.
That’s what I ask myself every evening. Thankfully most of the time my answer to myself is yes. I can always say “yes, I’m meeting my daughter’s needs”. I’m speaking more of the “quality” time. Mom guilt is a daily struggle.
My daughter is very attached to me and wants to play 24/7, but life is often in the way. Whether you’re a stay at home mom or a working mom, or a work from home mom, or a hybrid of those, you probably experience the same thing. There are always so many things to do, and it never seems like there’s enough time to play.
I’m not sure what the perfect balance looks like to me, but I know that it’s not what I feel like I’m doing most days. There’s always something to do, and it doesn’t seem like there’s much that can be eliminated. Walking the dog, doing cardio (only 30 minutes at home, so it’s not like that’s taking much time away from playing with my daughter), making dinner, cleaning up after dinner, showering, grocery shopping, paying bills, the list goes on. I guess the key would be to do better streamlining the things that can be more efficient – perhaps meal planning, etc.).
Or, maybe there is enough time and I have an unrealistic ideal of how much I should be playing with my daughter? Maybe I’m just not “present” enough when I’m with her. Ugh. The struggle is constant. I feel guilt when I’m doing something other than being with her, and I feel guilty when I am with her but am not playing because I have to do something like make dinner.
The daily struggle is what leads to the nightly question of whether I was a good mom that day.
I was recently laid off, so I should have more time to spend, but am using about 4-5 hours a day to work on things like this – writing this blog, shooting the Speaking Of videos that I recently started, doing my weekly videos with Dawn, editing all of those videos, looking for regular jobs, etc. Those are all valid, but I feel guilty because I’m doing something other than playing with her. It’s still less than the time in a standard workday, but the guilt is just the same.
I suppose the key is to make the most of the time that I do have, and *try* not to get mad at myself for doing the best I can. It’s totally valid to exercise, and to walk the dog, and to make dinner (or at least pick it up…), and to work. It’s tough to let go of guilt, but I’m working on it.
Check out the latest video from me and Dawn! We chat about everything from our kids’ sticker escapades, to bathing suit shopping, figuring out what’s appropriate clothing for our age, and wanting to shop after being stuck inside during the quarantine!
Hi! Dawn and I recorded our first videoon Sunday and are happy to share it. As mentioned previously, this is our first video and we’re not experts, so hang with us. 🙂
We figured what better topic for our first chat than… Coronavirus/COVID-19. We are not medical experts and aren’t talking about the virus itself, but rather living in a world where all of this is new! Somehow we end up talking about cooking at home too, haha!
We hope you enjoy!
PS – I’m Stephanie, on the left, and Dawn is on the right.
Wintry, rainy, January, now February days can make for some serious cabin fever. I am thankful that I have found some great activities to keep my busy boys occupied this winter aside from climbing the walls and jumping on their beds, smh, so I thought that I would share!
The first activity that I take them to is a kid’s yoga class, called, “Kidding Around with Yoga with Miss Jennie”. I found out about this class through a flier that I picked up from a downtown Irwin store, Feathers, and I have attended two classes since with both of my boys, ages 4 and 6.
I love that my kids are doing Yoga, because it doesn’t feel like a committed activity, like baseball, soccer, etc., and they both can participate at the same time. Plus, all the kids are learning great techniques in relaxing, mediation, and exercise along with coping skills when they are having, a bad day to just relax and take a deep breath. I highly recommend it!
My next activity that I practically auto-enroll them in are swimming classes at the Wilmerding Community Center, because both kids can take their class on the same night. This place recently changed from YMCA to Wilmerding Community Center, so it is an older facility but still has a great pool! Classes are reasonably priced and taught by excellent instructors who take their time with the kids when they need additional help or are scared of jumping in the pool. They also have a family changing room for parents, like me, who don’t always have their spouse around to help change kids out of wet clothes.
And finally, my last share on a winter activity is taking the kids out to the bowling alley. My kids love this place, because they get to throw bowling balls, get to knockdown bowling pins, and play in the arcade. One other honorable mention of my kids’ love for this place are the vending machines that my kids hit me up for pop, bubble-gum, and useless toys. The bowling alley is just a great way to get in some good quality time together while playing a very low-maintenance sport.
Hopefully some of these ideas help to inspire you to get out of your hibernation mode.
Kennedy’s the 2017 Charleston March for Babies ambassador, and today was the kickoff lunch! It was such a great time to be in the room with the other teams, each full of people ready to help support the March of Dimes mission.
What is it about babies that makes them so darn adorable and addictive??? Yesterday at work, one lady brought her 6-month old baby (because her baby got a fever and had to be picked up from daycare). The baby was so quiet – she didn’t make a peep all day! Somehow just seeing this sweet little peanut at the office made me want to literally go running home to my baby!!!
I ended up working longer than normal yesterday, and by the time I left I really couldn’t wait to get home! When I got through the door, Kennedy was waiting with a smile. That girl is too much! I just want to hug her all day, everyday! She’s really into high-fiving and making funny faces right now, which makes it even more fun when she greets you.
As it turns out, I did get to spend a ton of time with her yesterday, because that little night owl didn’t go to sleep until 1:30am! She has more energy than anyone I know. Foolishly, I thought putting the cool projector on would mesmerize her enough to fall asleep. That backfired. She did find the projector to be mesmerizing, but it just wound her up more!! She stood up in her bed, started pointing and oohing and ahhhing at the stars on the ceiling. Finally I just caved and held her til she fell asleep. Oops. I completely realize that I ended up wasting my time because ultimately picking her up just encourages her to do that again to avoid going to sleep, but 2 hours of that was enough for one night. 😀
She’s my only baby, and as mentioned in other posts, will always be the only baby. So, to be honest, I don’t really care if I “spoil” her or if she likes to be held all the time. She’s so special and with everything she went through when she was born, I want to snuggle her and don’t feel guilty about that at all! It’s really crazy to look at her now and imagine that she had a rough start. You would seriously never know. She’s my little Power Preemie who’s capable of anything! I’m ready for this girl to start talking and share all of her thoughts with us! She’s only one, but she’s had such an interesting life already and I’m sure she has tons of cool things to say!